1. Poor Appearance/Attire
First impressions are very important when it comes to the first date. Even though we tell ourselves we shouldn’t judge a book by its cover, we unfortunately often do. First dates are no exception. Is work stress taking its toll on your appearance? When getting back into the dating scene give yourself enough rest, exercise and a good diet so you can show off your best self when searching for matches. What you wear is incredibly important as well. If you are unsure on how your image is coming across it is best to work with a stylist for tips on what looks best for your height, body type, etc. With our mid tier package we work with a very good stylist (whom we will discuss on another blog post) that helps gentleman look their very best. Self awareness is key and a second opinion can help put your best foot forward!
2. Not Getting Over the Past
Talking about your ex too much? Hmm ya not a good thing. It is perfectly normal to talk about past relationships once getting to know one another, discussing what worked and what didn’t. Dwelling on a past ex or relationship on the first date can kill the mood and make your date think maybe you aren’t over your ex and ready to date yet. Continually bashing your ex is also not a good look and can prevent you from moving on to a second date with someone you would have had a promising relationship with.
3. No Confidence
Being too passive and not possessing a healthy self confidence can kill a date. Communication skills are key. For men, shyness can prevent them from letting their date know that they are into them. Women love to feel wanted and telling them they look beautiful or have an amazing outfit on will definitely let a lady know you are into her and interested in a second date. If your not confident in yourself then you may be afraid to communicate effectively with a woman leading her to believe that you are actually not into her at all or even worse, she will friend zone you.
4. Too Cocky
The opposite of the previous setback of no confidence is being too cocky on a first date. I once had a coffee date with someone who went on their phone in the middle of the date to talk about their “$20 million dollar deal” all while flashing their gold Rolex. Talk about tacky! Being overtly cocky is actually someone who in reality has no real confidence and is covering it up by having a huge ego. Being proud of your accomplishments is one thing but being blatantly cocky will not get you a second date no matter how much money you have or you will attract the wrong type of partner.
5. No Manners
I can’t believe I have to list this as a point but having gone on several dates myself and having experienced this makes it worth posting. Unfortunately, nowadays a lot of chivalry is dead. Simple things such as opening the door for a lady or paying for dinner is forgotten in dating etiquette. Being rude to waiters or waitresses on a date is totally unacceptable. Chewing food loudly is another faux pas. Asking how much money someone makes, just no. Trying to mess around with your date on the first date is too desperate. Also, please put away your phone! Like really?? Basic etiquette should not be forgotten and it may be why you never got past the first date.
There you have it! If you need to work on your dating game please contact me for date coaching details.